Keeping it real and keeping it going

chocolate cake

There are bloggers who have the prettiest pictures.  Some with the most beautifully decorated homes.  Others are incredibly creative, sharing projects and ideas I envy.

There are food bloggers posting polished, new recipes each day, accompanied by photos belonging in fancy magazines.  Then there are those whose words seem to flow effortlessly, smooth and sweet like honey.

duke waking from sleep

I’m not any of those bloggers.  I lack photography skills.  I’m not terribly creative and generally need an inspiration picture to get going on a DIY project.

My home often has toys strewn about, Munchie’s artwork taped to walls, Duke’s tennis balls underfoot.  Even though I try to vacuum daily, you can find dog hair somewhere.  Dinner is often basic and pretty simple.  I often don’t have it in me to do a perfectly plated meal just so I can snap photos for the blog.  I just want to eat.

baked potato dinner

Many days I start a post only to have the words get stuck somewhere between my brain and my fingertips.  Sometimes it takes days before I get back to that post, before the words finally start coming together.  More often than not, the right sentences form in my head when I’m away from the computer–grocery shopping or watching Munchie’s soccer game.  I can’t bring myself to dig through my purse for paper and pen.  I’m frazzled or am in the moment with my little one.  So that well-formed blog post in my head evaporates before I get home.

soccer goal kicks before game cropped

Recently, feeling somewhat under the weather, I mulled over those blogs, compared mine to those, and considered whether blogging is worth my time and energy.  Then two weeks ago, out of the blue, I got a note from someone who follows Cozycakes Cottage and my accompanying Facebook page.

mommy breakfast in bed

They were encouraged by me!  I was surprised by that kind note.  And I was encouraged by that person.  I began to think that I may be a bit of comfort to more people like me.  Someone who, in addition to reading blogs written by people who lead seemingly perfect lives, reads the imperfect ones.  The ones where you know that gal is saying to her family at dinner time, “PLEASE COME TO THE TABLE!” for the 3rd time.  That blog where you see she had to zoom in on a picture of the cake she made to crop out the fifty things people dropped on the kitchen table that morning.  That blog where she really doesn’t know if she should keep it up, but something tells her to keep creating and sharing.


I love those beautiful blogs I follow.  They provide me inspiration.  They perk me up some days.  I appreciate what they do and what they offer–there’s no resentment.  They’re talented folks with the ability to elicit creativity or emotion in others and catalyze imagination and ingenuity.  Often they’re comforting in their beauty alone.  And let’s face it: I like pretty things and I won’t stop reading them.

blue hydrangeas

But I hold near and dear those blogs whose creators let it all out now and then.  As close friends do. Offering up stories and anecdotes of personal defeat, exhausting days, and flawed lives.  I don’t want to see anyone miserable, but I do love to feel a connection.  That there’s a real person behind those words and pictures.  And I just can’t really connect to perfect.  I can value it, but I can’t fully connect.

So I keep on blogging.  And I’d like to share more here.  Write a little more, open up about tough days, challenging situations.  Chat about the real stuff, those things that matter in the day-to-day.  Encourage one another when we’re feeling stressed, inadequate, tired.  Because even though the comment section is sometimes bare, I’m pretty sure there’s  someone like me on the other side of that screen thinking, “I get it.”

26 thoughts on “Keeping it real and keeping it going

  1. Great post… Love it! I have the same thoughts all the time and often am cropping things out of pictures. We don’t have perfect houses, perfect pictures or perfect words and that makes us real… We are human just like the next person.

    1. I don’t know why I didn’t respond to any of these comments a year ago…it is a real mystery since I’m sitting here reading them now and want to hug all who took the time to comment. Yours is one of the few blogs I read all the time and am grateful I have a friend like you to walk down this blogging road with, Marlys. Thank you so much. XOXO

  2. Yes, there are perfect bloggers out there, but you keep me giggling, sweet friend! And thanks for keeping it real….I have many days I feel like I fail at all things domestic. We’re all in this together, and I wouldn’t trade a perfect blog for perfect friends or a good laugh 🙂

    1. Thank you so much, Kim! Totally in this together! High five! p.s. Don’t know why I don’t have a reply to you here already. Sorry for the delay!

  3. Dearest D…..
    I am in awe of you. Always have been. I admire you and respect you for what you do. I can never be as talented in so many ways as you, but that’s ok. I have you to read and encourage. I think that your photography skills are just great and your writing often flawless. Keep on doing what your doing, and we who care will be there.
    Much love and thanks for the support you have shown me.

    1. Judith, you’re far, far too kind. Thank you for following along and for the support. It’s funny that even when I break from this space, I still want to come back. It helps to have friends like you out there supporting and hanging out. Hugs, ~D p.s. I apologize for this delayed reply–I don’t know what happened and why I’ve not replied…odd.

    1. I don’t know why my replies are not here, did I never hit publish? But thank you (very late), thank you so much, Amber!

    1. Thank you, Devi–I feel the same about yours! And apologize for this late reply–I don’t know what happened, but so happy to see your comment now. Love to ya!

  4. I love how you share! Your blog, the FB page, pictures, you keep it real and very personable and that is what makes your blog so charming! It’s sharing a life well lived and loved come what may and it’s refreshing!

    1. I’m sorry for the delay in this reply and all replies (I really don’t know why I haven’t replied, it’s a mystery)–But thank you, Dawn! You’re so supportive and kind here and over on the FB page. I appreciate your rah-rah! and always being so positive. It’s very encouraging, I tell ya! Sending you a hug. XOXO

  5. You are doing an excellent job of inspiring young women to be “keepers of the home” through your example as wife, mother, cook, baker, blogger and so much more. As a mother of two daughters and grandmother of four, I hope my own girls will be encouraged by your vulnerability, creativity and inspiration. Keep doing what you are doing and know that you are making a difference!

    1. Marsha, thank you so much for the kind words–these comments from all of you have me teary–in a good way. I fail in so many areas, so often, but I guess that’s life, right? Fall down, get up, keep trying. If I can encourage your girls in a small way, that’d be pretty cool 🙂 I’d be so happy to have helped anyone in even the slightest way. YOU are encouraging. Many thanks! xx P.S. I apologize for the delay in reply–I don’t know how I’ve not replied, tis a mystery!

  6. D!!! I think you are too hard on yourself! When you talk about perfect blogs, I think of you! Perfect in your cooking, photography, juggling all things, creativity, writing skills, finding time for family and providing a clean cozy home, but more than that, for being true and being you! I can vouch for your authenticity. I’ve always loved you for being “real,” but I admire you for all things on this blog! You inspire me everytime I read it, even if it’s the couple seconds I have while the kids get their shoes on before we are out the door. If this blog is still fulfilling you, PLEASE keep it going for us :-). Xoxo

    1. I can’t believe I’ve not replied to these! Maybe they were deleted in my blog transfer? I don’t know, but reading this makes me wanna squeeze you–you’re an amazing friend who always encourages me even when I’m THE worst to be around. Far from perfect over here, but you help me to keep going with this blog and I appreciate you so much, Abby. You get it. Love you!

  7. This may be my favorite post of yours, my blogging friend! I completely can relate to that feeling. Some nights at 10 pm when I’m fighting to stay awake so I can upload that picture, or reply to that follower on Facebook, I wonder why I do this. Then a friend on the sidelines of a flag football game tells me that she loved what I wrote and could completely relate. And it makes it all worth it! You are inspiring to those of us who are real moms, living our every day real motherhood, which is messy and imperfect and not always how we want it to be. But we’re trying. And your words remind us to keep doing so. Thank you, my friend. xoxo

    1. Augh, I can’t understand why I’ve not replied…? In any case, Beth, thank you so much! It is worth it, isn’t it? As long as we keep feeling it, feel encouraged to continue, why not continue? You’ve been a great blog friend (and real friend) from the get-go and I thank YOU for that! You’re a huge encouragement to me. XOXO

  8. I’ll be honest…I don’t spend much time reading blogs or on FB, etc. since I have to spend so much time on the computer at work. But I do glance at yours, and this post really resonated with me! You don’t pretend to be perfect and that just makes you more approachable…a real friend even if we have never met!
    Life is never simple; it can get very crazy and frustrating. Now that my children are grown and I have an empty nest, I read your comments and remember the days like you describe. They fly by, but they are good ones overall!
    Be proud of yourself, your loved ones, and this blog! You touch the heart & mind of more people than you know!

    1. I must apologize for the delay in this reply as I have no idea why I didn’t reply to even one of these? So odd. But…I can’t tell you how I loved reading how you felt a friendship–that is so much of what this blog is to me–connecting with others over our lives, trials, laughs. The day to day, the special moments. I am greatly encouraged by you and your comment touched me so. Please visit again soon so we can chat some more. Thank you so much, Yvonne. xx

  9. Thank you for your words, I really enjoyed reading this post and love all of these beautiful pictures and wonderful recipes! Keep on blogging, I would miss your posts! Warm regards, Bridget

    1. Thank you so much for the encouragement and kind words, Bridget. That means a lot! And I apologize for this late reply…I don’t know how I didn’t reply or if they were deleted. In any case, thank you and hugs!

  10. I just want to say that I love your blog, your recipes, your photos, your sense of humor, your cleverness, and YOU! You are a great friend and I wish you lived down the street from me 🙂 Don’t give up on your blog…it’s a sunny place in a sometimes dreary world.

    1. Aw, Erin, I feel the same! I can see us hanging out and having the kiddies play. Thank you for being around since the beginning! I feel the same about your blog/you as well. XOXO p.s. Sorry this reply is so late. I don’t know what happened, so odd…

I love your comments and read them all.