I hereby declare a New Toy Ban!

Despite the fact that my husband and I feel our daughter has more than enough toys scattered about this house and despite the fact that we made a pact to severely limit the number of toys that enter this house, Munchie received new toys for Christmas.

(pause for a large, exaggerated sigh)

My main issue with toys is that she isn’t interested in the majority of them.  This means that all those little cutesy pieces of plastic lose their appeal after 4.5 minutes of use.  And, like Gremlins, they somehow manage to multiply and divide themselves across all rooms in our home.  And then you hear me grumbling and kicking them out of my way when I step on one or 5 throughout my day.

My second issue is that there are plenty of children who would love the toys my daughter so casually tosses aside.  Thus, we are in the process of going through all her toys together so we can donate them to a better cause than our household clutter.  In addition, I prefer her to use her imagination with a few toys she adores (like her baby dolls and animals, kitchen, art & craft supplies, and books) as well as regular household items.

For example, today she decided our counterstools were a cage she was trapped behind and had to escape with her precious animals, used a few boxes as icebergs to “float” from room to room, created a library for her babies and herself with dozens of her books and spent over an hour reading them to our dog.

At the last minute I tried to capture the sweet moment, but by the time I returned with camera in hand, she was sitting atop our patient Golden Retriever, arm extended over her head, twirling a piece of yarn in the air, shouting, “Giddy-up, HorseDog!  I’ve got a town to save!”  Poor HorseDog.

Let’s not forget the cost of toys.  This gal loves a good bargain.  But bargain or not, waste is waste.  Money is too hard-earned for me to buy items we don’t need or love.

Implement toy ban!

Today’s source of frustration, prompting me to declare a toy ban, is the ten minutes I spent attempting to open a box.  A little box which held a tiny toy.  A toy Munchie doesn’t seem overly thrilled to receive.  I could rant about the person who decided this was a great gift except I bought it for Munchie months ago at the Great Target Toy Clearance (I’m not sure if that’s the official name, but that’s what I believe it was named by eager shoppers of this annual sale).  Do not let me shop that sale again.

After a scene (sadly reminiscent of the Mommy Dearest no-more-wire-hangers catastrophe…don’t worry, Munchie was not a target…it was all about the toys) which included a lot of grumbling, flailing arms, shouts of, “I’m imposing a toy ban!”, sweat, and exhaustion (no joke, real sweat, real exhaust) the toy was released from its unnecessary Alcatraz box and I walked away with 2 cuts and a need for coffee and a baked good.

And that’s why today is the official start of the New Toy Ban declaration in this household.

Is anyone with me on the toy issue?

Off to grab a cookie.

3 thoughts on “I hereby declare a New Toy Ban!

  1. This post made me laugh. More than once. And that is saying a lot, because I am not a promiscuous laugher. I’m more of a wry smile, raised-eyebrow, make-you-wonder-what-the-heck-I’m-thinking kind of humorist.
    “Giddy-up, HorseDog!”
    “the toy was released from its unnecessary Alcatraz box and I walked away with 2 cuts and a need for coffee and a baked good.”

    Thank you.

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